Thursday, December 3, 2009
Exodus 20:
To everyone connected or at least partially tuned in to the outside world as of late I'm sure you are well aware of The Tiger Woods Saga. You've heard the voice mail messages, you've seen the "traffic accident" images and have heard opinions from sportswriters, news anchors, and the assorted bunch. As I write this passage I find it ironic that I'm watching last nights broadcast of the George Lopez show where the funniest Mexican Dude on television has a few minutes worth of Tiger jokes and is landing jab after jab on the poor fella!
Initial reactions - I am a sports lover. I live for competition! en mi opinion, winning and losing helps us to discover who and what we are. I love waking up every morning and watching highlights of my favorite players scoring a winning goal, slam dunk on Chris Bosh and scream at him Paul Pierce, Chad Ochocinco do that dance, pay that bribe to the referee. That is the thrill, the rush you get from competition. Those are some of the things that attract/draw us to our favorite sports "celebrities".
Over the last week or two ESPN, the network my TV set is usually locked on has been talking Tiger almost to a point of frustration. I mean what's the big deal with a guy having a car accident in his own yard? Why in a down economy is the state of Florida spending so much time and money on this? I mean are we really that bored, lonely, or comfortably miserable in our own existence that auto accidents are news worthy? Or did they actually know something that we didn't, something they thought we may or may not care about?
Phase 2 - Tuesday AM. I wake up to ESPN, business as usual. Tiger is apologizing thru his website which is now being broadcast over the air. The journalists are eating it up. The news stations are loving it and Facebookers aka those at work that ain't workin' are taking moments to add their 3 to 5 cents in. I figured damn Le Tigre, say it ain't so. I mean you're a corny brotha, a smooth ass golf playing, Ivy league type that I wouldn't mind my future child admiring or looking up to. Why are you on TV apologizing to "us" for a car accident and why are you confessing your sins to the nation. F*ck "us" get on your knees and talk to the big homey. He or she is the only one that can help you now. Other professional athletes are now taking shots at you, funny how quickly they turn on you huh?
A couple hours go by and now the word is out. The side chicks, you know the ones you met on the road in LA, NY, Vegas etc. are now showing their faces and why? To add to your misery and to see if they can make a few dollars (of course her book will be coming soon). And damn, they look so good! I mean they should right? They are talent for hire, the finest chick in Kissmycousin, Arkansas needs to escape to Hollywood to be in entertainment right? LA, the city where one of your chicks resides is full of them! I know, I lived there almost four years. Most are talentless, typically pretty, short on cash, and the overall down for WHATEVER types! So now she drops the tape and its all over the internet and television. Yes that tape, you know the one that you made the worst non-playa move ever on! I heard it and it went something like this, "Ummmm please erase your name off the voice mail message" so when my wife calls you I can still try and argue my way out of this bullsh*t! El Tigre, B+ for effort, F for performance.
Tiger, you're not a player buddy! Please return your card to the rightful owners.
The Fade - in an effort to keep this short and sweet, especially because many of you reading this are at work and should be, well you know! Let me leave you with an easy set of solutions should you ever end up on either side of the Tiger, Clinton, Jordan, or Angelina Jolie house.
1. Ask yourselves, what am I doing or NOT doing that would make my mate feel ok (internally) with stepping outside of our Holy Union?
2. And then ask, I know this person is a ________ and is very highly sought after, should he/she be approached by, tramp on the road, Governor Spitzer, Monica Lewinsky, handsome six pack abs brotha from the handsome hunks calendar and decides to indulge, would I be okay with that? If your very immediate answer is no, then aim for someone closer to your range. Understand and accept that there is a price that COULD possibly come with dating/marrying "public figures". (Price = they may get a little on the side when they think you're not lookin')Unless you both have an equally matching swag, it's probably going to end up in disaster!
3. At the end of the day understand that time spent on Earth is short and that the Penguin is the only animal on the planet that keeps its mate for life (they only actually live together for mating and babysitting purposes, about half the year). The decisions that we make we have to live with and more importantly depending on your belief system you will one day have to justify the decisions and choices made before the man/woman upstairs. Think about that before that third glass of wine makes it easy for you to take your married a*s up the elevator to somebody's hotel room.
Steve McNair - R.I.P
My Thoughts, My World
PS1
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
say it ain’t so...
- Skinny jeans make me worry, like a Grandma does…
- once upon a time I saw a documentary called American Mullet!
- record stores are all but gone?
- China is celebrating its 60th year of Communist rule!
- Nike re-signed Michael Vick…
- Entourage season 6 has been real and sadly is almost over…
- metal cars use more gas, but are way cooler!
- the most comfortable shoes are usually not as fresh…
- some think the corporations are destroying the music?
- real sugar will not hurt you as bad as the replacements…
- within some sub-cultures lady arm pit hair is considered sexy…
- Nike denies re-signing Michael Vick but will seed him with product?
- U.S. troops are training recruits in Afghanistan for the Afghan National Army...
- Sportscenter es no bueno during Hockey season!
PS1
Thursday, September 17, 2009
little mikey...
Evan told him that he could be the biggest Kid
Its so weird that he never really was a Kid
And Kid did what other kids never did whatever Kid
Real Kid paid close attention
And genius asked question after long question
And his profession was somehow a sorted lesson
It's God's gift be on your way with God's bless in...
PS1
Monday, September 14, 2009
en mi opinion...
* Sooner or later somebody is gonna kick Kanye’s ass! I haven’t checked Taylor Swift’s police record yet but maybe she should do it!
* The Chargers are idiots for getting rid of Drew Brees!
* Boise St. Linebacker Byron Hout got knocked out with one punch on national television for taunting LeGarrette Blount following an Oregon loss. Justice has been served!
* Chad OchoCinco is a fool! Not bad meaning bad but bad meaning good...
* The Killers put on a great show!
* You should never yell a bartenders name, even if you are good friends!
* Jay-Z, Ice Cube, Rakim, Scarface and Tupac are the best rappers of all time, PERIOD!
* With only two real albums on his resume Biggie can’t be considered!
* The USC Trojans are an undercover pro football team!
* Sooner or later somebody is gonna kick Kanye’s ass!
* T.O. is a great player and unfortunately his mouth has landed him in Buffalo! Good luck in the cold homeboy.
* Entourage is one of the best shows ever!
* Rehab in Las Vegas is now wack, but it’s a great money maker!
* Fake tits feel cold!
* Too many corn balls and athletes are covered in tattoos!
* Shawn Merriman should have his card pulled for Tila Tequila!
* People that disappear in the middle of a text message conversation are wack!
* Tiger Woods is absolutely ridiculous!
* It’s better to stay home than to sit in the cheap seats!
* Serena Williams is gangsta, Wow!
* Former Oregon football player LeGarrette Blount was suspended for the entire 2009 season for doing what his parents taught him to do. “When somebody puts there hands on you, whup em!” Unfortunately for LeGarrette he went out of control after he punched Byron Hout and tried to attack the fans in the stands and that’s what I feel got him suspended? Get it together my man, get it together.
* San Francisco weather is just silly!
* Pedro Martinez is still off the chain!
* Bin Laden is an actor!
* You should never wave your money at a bartender!
* People with Face book drama should be taken out and shot!
* Catholic Priests are out of control… in the words of Pink Floyd – “Leave those kids alone”!
* Carlos Santana is a real cool cat! Go see him @ The Joint in Las Vegas this November at the Hard Rock Hotel. It’s small, intimate and very inexpensive
* Baseball managers and umpires should just fight!
* Debacterialize is a word!
* Weekend warriors should accept their very important role in society! The court systems rely heavily on your dough!
* Adrian Peterson is the man!
* Automatic payments suck ass! Wait til you see how hard it is to cancel something, they make it so hard especially AT&T
* Many words that are spoken should never be written!
* You should never order a TOP SHELF Long Island Ice Tea!
* T.O. has his own cereal called T.O.’s – FRESH!!!
PS1 out...
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
and the survey says...
The following entry was inspired by an email sent to me by my sister and then a trip next door to Trader Joe's. I felt somewhat like a cheat because I went into the store to buy fresh vegetables to make dinner and there it was… a pre-chopped onion, garlic and shallots medley! Joy?!?!?!
Some of the questions that follow I do have an opinion about but I am curious to see what my friends and family think???
Is it bad to use a calculator if you know how to add!
It is bad to listen to audio books if you know how to read?
Is it bad to use Cliff’s notes if you aren’t interested in the book assigned?
Is it bad to buy pre-sliced / diced fruits and vegetables?
Is it bad to hire a cleaning person if you know how to clean?
Is time money? Or is that just something we say when we don't want to be bothered with doing a favor?
Is the price of stamps getting out of control?
Why did your teacher tell you to look it up, when you asked how to spell it?
Why do the parking meters in San Francisco give you 8 minutes for the first 25 cents but only 15 minutes for 50 cents?
Why will your credit card company drop your APR if you call and threaten to cancel the card?
Why doesn’t the price of plane tickets drop dramatically right before the plane takes off in order to fill the empty seats?
- Aren’t they are going there anyway?
Why can Michael Vick play pre-season football but not regular season football until week 6?
Why do people order brand named liquor if they want mixers (usually sugar) added?
Why does Starbucks taste exactly the same no matter which store you go to?
Why do you need coffee in the morning?
Why is health care free in Canada?
Why are people embarrassed to admit that they don’t have health care?
Why is college free in some countries around the world?
Why can’t you get a job without previous experience? How do you get previous experience without a job?
- Are you still paying off college loans?
Why did Plaxico Burress hire a prison consultant?
- How do you become a prison consultant?
Why can't left-handed people play shortstop?
Why do college sports programs get penalized even though the coaches/players that broke the rules have moved on?
Why / how are there more than 53 domestic violence calls on the Monday after Super Bowl, but the losing team only has 53 players?
Do you mind listening to sportscasters that didn't play the sport they comment about?
Do you think athletes get paid too much?
Do team owners make more or less than the players?
Do you know anyone that went into business to break even?
Do you eat genetically engineered fruit like seedless watermelons, pluots or tangelos?
Do you remember life without cell phones?
Do you still own a home phone?
- If yes, why?
Do you prefer to text or talk?
Do you think it costs the phone company more money to connect you across the country than across the street?
Should you have to be a divorced to counsel people through theirs?
Should women give their girlfriends man advice if they don't have a man?
I'm looking forward to reading your thoughts... post them here or send them to my email.
PS1
Sunday, August 9, 2009
...random sh*t;
Major League Baseball – baseball is back!!! Called my best boy from the Giants game yesterday and realized how much I truly love Baseball. Once upon a time I was a huge fan, steroids took over, I lost interest and we broke up… It’s nice to see Baseball again, skinny fast guys stealing bases, some players batting less than .300, and every second baseman not hitting 50 home runs each… At this pace another couple years will have baseball back swinging stronger than ever!!!
For the record – I am and always will be a Padres fan, Hicks and Trina Jones! Now that baseball and I are dating again I am left to watch the Giants, the flight to Petco Park every Sunday would be costly… Former Padres manager Bruce Bochy has done a great job!!! The fact that the Giants are now winners makes our affair even easier…
Dominican Republic - off the hook! Please visit and while visiting please appreciate modern primitive living!!! Very refreshing…
Tequila – did you know that Tequila is the only liquor that makes you happy? Hard to believe, look around the room at your local Tequila bar!!!
Michael Vick – welcome back and good luck! ESPN highlights and Berman / Jackson haven’t been the same without you!!!
Brisco – this Miami hip hop recording artist was recently robbed in a barber shop following a photo shoot. The robbery was caught on tape and Brisco was recorded saying “I’ll just get bigger jewelry and more shine!” hmmmmmm, think that you might get robbed again?... I’m just sayin’
GI Joe – go see it and parents definitely take your boys or even better drop them off with their boys and give ‘em popcorn money! The action is non-stop and they actually do a very good job with the characters. The cartoon was my favorite as a child so I was a little nervous that it would tank… Two thumbs up!!!
Til Then - ps out!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
high on intelligence, low on information...
Heading north from
Our first full day in the city and we were blessed with amazing weather so we decided to take a cruise around town. We went up and down the big huge hills where the cars have to park sideways; we traveled down
On our journey downtown while trying to explain what that meant we saw the big triangle shaped building that commands the attention of anyone staring at the
The Exploratorium inside the
During the little guys visit we would stop by the lounge every other day or so to say hi to Mike. I had to explain why people leave money on the bar when they buy a drink but I still don’t think I made that clear? He earned a few dollars during his stay doing odd jobs and completing simple tasks. The homeless or addiction challenged people out on the streets begging for his hard earned dinero didn’t stand a chance! Try explaining to a six year old why it’s ok to hang out all day and hit people up for their hard earned dough, and when you do please help me understand as well!
Fourteen days is a long time for a single guy to play mom and dad in a single person’s city. Thank God for a few good friends, Uncle Mack, chocolate milk and cinnamon toast crunch. Without the before mentioned who knows what might have happened to me and the little guy? With kids, a simple trip to dinner is no longer an option. To the people sitting next to you, privacy aint happenin’. One night at dinner I could tell the couple sitting next to us was on a first or second date just by their body language. I felt bad because we were loud and his food was everywhere. Then I thought this might be the best gift ever because after the countless cocktails they knocked back maybe my little Tasmanian Devil inspired them to finish their night very carefully!
With every trip on the train I found myself apologizing to the person sitting across from us for being stepped on or being kicked over and over again. Ice Skating lasted all of ten minutes. I wasn’t down with taking a spill on the ice so I couldn’t be mad at the little guy for feeling the same way. “Pizza with salad stuff on it” is probably the worst invention ever. As funny as that sounded the first time I heard him say uuuuhhhh, I couldn’t help but agree. Hummus wasn’t happenin’. My world famous and very delicious eggs with ground up broccoli, onions and garlic wasn’t even worth considering, those went completely untouched. Plain eggs were prepared and they were devoured. The crust of all bread slices was left on his plate every time. Daily I juice and therefore I am, the kid wasn’t havin’ that. If anything other than oranges went into that juice machine and he was turned off and tuned out.
I often talk to my mom about the little guys habits and how “picky” he is. My opinion, he actually has it all figured out at an early age. He already lives by the law my friends and I aspire to live by, “things I’m doin’and things I ain't doin’!” All I can do for now is just admire the little dude for practicing this ideology decades before I learned to.
Very intelligent and still seeking information...
Peace,
PS1
Friday, April 3, 2009
The Cutler Situation...
Over the past few weeks those of you that follow sports even a little bit have probably heard about the drama in Denver. The end of last the last football season marked the beginning of the end of Jay Cutlers stay in Denver and playing professional football for the Denver Broncos. After another disappointing season in Denver the Broncos decided to fire their head coach Mike Shannahan and bring on a young and not as experienced coach out of the New England Patriots organization, Josh McDaniels. McDaniels spent the past couple of years grooming and nurturing a young quarterback Matt Cassel who suprisingly led the Patriots to an 11-5 season after losing their starting quarterback early in the season to injury. When McDaniels became the head coach in Denver this off-season he did what most leaders would like to do, build his team with his players. Unfortunatley for McDaniels he was not successful in trading for Cassel into Denver and ultimately lost the faith and respect in then current starting quarterback Jay Cutler.
The past month or so has brought on many debates and opinions about Cutler and his sensitivity, his child like behavior and his needing to get over it. HUH??? Get over it? What does it say about the society that we live in when your new boss attempts to get rid of you because he feels he has someone that can accomplish the task at hand better than you can and the public criticizes you and calls you childish for saying, ok then I'm out.
I started this letter by thanking GOD, thanking him for sending us a public figure that is willing to say "F*CK YOU new boss! F*CK YOU, for trying to unsuccessfully trade me, F*CK YOU for asking me to come and work for you after you couldn't get who you really wanted. I, Jay Cutler am suppossed to pick up the phone and accept your meeting invitation, listen to your apology, then get in front of a camera and say everything is ok? I am Jay Cutler a Pro-Bowl, All Star Quarterback! I am one of the best in my profession and I am suppossed to be ok with someone trying to get rid of me? I'm sorry is for people that are sorry and always feels so empty to me. I'm sorry is almost like a pass to do whatever you want and then be let off the hook by easily saying I'm sorry. The current trend of American culture had me expecting to turn on the radio or telelvision last month to hear Jay Cutler reading a letter written by his publicist saying that he and McDaniels had resolved their issues and are looking forward to a great and productive season. I was so relieved to hear that he took a 100,000.00 hit for not showing up to VOLUNTARY workouts. Wait a minute, "I am not receiving my bonus because I missed a VOLUNTARY workout?" Maybe Jay's four years at Vanderbilt Universtiy meant nothing and he was never taught what the word VOLUNTARY means?
April 2nd 2009, Jay Cutler is traded to the Chicago Bears and his new life begins. Josh McDaniels you are no longer worthy to utilize Cutlers skill set and the people in Colorado have been steered to believing that Cutler is to blame. Again, ask yourself how you might feel if you busted your ass to become great at what you do, lose your coach / mentor only to have a new, young and inexperienced coach step in and try and fix something that wasn't broken to begin with. Keep in mind that Jay Cutler is a Pro Bowl All Star player.
The best of luck to you Jay Cutler, Manny Ramirez of the LA Dodgers and any other employee that makes a business tons of money only to be told to take it or leave it when Big Boss Pimp Nasty is finished with you!!! I THANK YOU for telling them to take it or leave it!!!
Questions - Are we ALL ok with just getting by? Are we OK with being shit on time and time again? When and where do you draw your line in the sand?
Prostitution is illegal!!!
PS1
Monday, March 23, 2009
Runaway Rubbish...
Kaiser 5:15 AM - after checking in I wasn't in a panic but had all types of random thoughts running thru my head. I hadn't been in an emergency room since I broke my foot when I was 13. I was thinking about every hip-hop record I've ever heard criticizing the service people get in emergency rooms. After my experience I should record one too! Nurses cracking jokes, victims of bar fights being ridiculed (some of those stories were entertaing though), a couple nurses gossiping and a doctor that looked long overdue for a good nights sleep. When I finally got some attention and told my story I was told by two nurses that doesn't look like a trash can incident, my question "what does a trash can incident look like???" Had I known that this reality TV watching, hoping for a good story to take home type of staff was looking for an adventure, man would I have given 'em one. Believe that!!!
I felt like I was being punished for a while because after not feeding the right gangster fairy tale to the staff they all but ignored me for about an hour??? Yes, about an hour! It didnt really set in until this smoking hot bartender from a bar that I know comes in in a wheel chair with a twisted ankle and the male nurses some women too were all over her! I was in the bed next curtain over and I could hear everything. They had no shame! I was like damn patch her up and take her to breakfast already! Attention male nurse perverts - I can hear you, this is not a wall this is a curtain!
It is now about 730 AM and they finally start working on me. The up-sale is now on, according to the staff I was near death if I refused any of the products they suggested. I normally stay as far away from modern medicine as I can but given the fact that my pinky was damn near severed I felt I should comply. 11 stiches and 3 hours later I was released and sent home with prescriptions to be filled.
Moral of this story - get your Jackie Chan on and drop kick the dumpster should you ever be in a similar predicament.
PS1
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
el presidente...
Check it out and for those of you that dont follow college hoops the guy actually knows what he's doing. I still have Louisville winning it all!!!
See you soon... PS1
http://games.espn.go.com/tcmen/entry?entryID=2813746